It has honestly got to the point where I dread looking at my social media feeds. As someone who writes online content and is a self-confessed social media junkie, that’s a pretty sad testament to the situation.
I’m just so over the mummy shaming.
You see it everyday, multiple times a day. And I’m not talking shame-worthy stuff here. If you post a picture or video of something that blatantly endangers your child or is illegal, I endorse open slather. #sorrynotsorry
However, it’s the self-righteous attacks on other people’s parenting choices that really get my goat.
The straw that broke the camel’s back for me was a post about a mother who was attacked for straightening her daughter’s hair. She was accused of sexualising her child. Seriously, people. It’s hair.
I’ve seen similar posts about people colouring their young children’s hair vibrant colours. People come out of the woodwork with accusations of bad parenting and poisoning the child without any background knowledge or context. It could have been organic beetroot dye for all we know and the kid was dressing up for a play. Not that it’s really any of our business.
And hair is just the tip of the iceberg.
It has really got to the point that proud parent’s can’t share anything without fear of criticism. It is not surprising celebrity mums (and dads) are prime targets for haters who tear them apart for every little thing. They can’t dress their kids, kiss them, carry them, feed them or show off their talents without the trolls coming to play.
Of course, there is the totally valid point that if you put yourself out there you have to be prepared for feedback, however what happened to etiquette? What happened to “If you don’t have anything nice to say…”?
Click away and move on.
We all want the best for our kids and it is hard enough to feel confident as a parent at the best of times. Every mum second-guesses their decisions and wonders if they are doing the right thing. Public ambush doesn’t help.
I’m no psychologist but I assume it comes from equal measures of feeling threatened and feeling superior.
Scenarios such as this play out across the internet everyday: One mum posts a lunchbox picture showing a pack of chips while another mum shares that she only packs all natural whole foods for their kid. They each need to justify their choices by tearing the other down. Not cool.
The truth is, mummy shaming has evolved from quiet whispers and arched eyebrows at play groups, parks and the school gate to all out virtual warfare.
We warn our children against the dangers of bullying and cyber bullying, yet it seems grownups can be very poor role models.
So please, next time you see a parent post something you don’t agree with, make a stand against mummy shaming and just click away.
None of us are perfect, after all.